Princess Leia

Episode 1: Attack of the rocking chair

It’s 6:20pm, I’m still at the office, and I have to make it to norfolk and back to virginia beach by 8pm for a meeting/date/gettogether with a lady from tinder, aka Princess Leia. It seems that I hit every red light to and from my apartment. Finally, I get to our meeting place, a bubble tea shop called “yo mamas.” Except I don’t see it: there’s a Petco, a mexican restaurant, and harris teeter, but no “yo mamas.” I send Leia a message, saying it’s not here, thinking it probably closed. (it was actually around the corner) She says she will be a bit late and to wait there.

“Whatever,” I’m thinking. I decide to meander through Petco and stare at all the miserable animals. It’s around 20 minutes after we are supposed to meet and I don’t see her or “yo mamas.” I get back in my car, about to call it quits.

“i’m here,” she texts. She says to park in front of harris teeter. Ok, I drive to the parking lot next to harris teeter, and see a lady in her car, texting. That has to be her. I walk over, next to her car, and start waving like a creep. #Success. She gets out of her car. Oh my! First impressions: short, curvy, and super pretty. She gets out and we hug eachother after exchanging awkward “hi/hellos.”

Then she gets back in her car and puts the key in the ignition, like she is about to drive away.

“Dangit! What’d I do wrong.”

She just needed to roll up her car windows.

We start walking to harris teeter and decide we should probably just drive the block over to “yo mamas.” Finally, we reach the bubble tea shop. We walk up to the shop, she opens the door, and promptly crashes into a rocking chair, that was protruding in front of the entrance: too cute. (I probably should have asked her if she was ok, because it looked painful) Moving onward…

In the back corner, there are mini styrofoam buckets, which is for the ice cream/frozen yogurt. Next to the buckets, are the ice cream dispenser things; greent tea, strawberry, vanilla, and I forgot the other flavors. Then there’s a row of toppings with pretty much every fruit and candy you can think of. Nice. I decided on vanilla, green tea, with strawberrys and weird jelly bean looking things. Leia, is still deciding on toppings. I also get an orange bubble tea. I forget which flavor bubble tea Leia chooses. We sit down at a table towards the back of the bubble tea place.

I get a good look at her; pretty blue eyes but they look glazed, like she just smoked 8 joints. Maybe she’s just really tired, like I was. I ask her about her ex-bf because that’s always a great topic for a meeting; summary of her reply is holes in walls, disappearing, fights, and other interesting stuff.

“what are you thinking?” she asks.

“nothing,” I reply back. On a side note, maybe “yo mamas” is just crappy, but bubble tea, is pretty nasty. So was their ice cream. 1 star, would not recommend.

“what does your brother do?” I ask her.

“nothing,” she replies, then starts laughing; “well he mostly sits in his room and collects stuff from amazon.” Hmmm, that pretty much describes every guy in his early 20’s.

Its getting late, so we leave. As she drives off, I can hear one of her tires is flat.

…to be continued.

Princess Leia